My thoughts on a tough day to swallow

Akron closer Vinnie Pestano shares his thoughts on yesterday's tragedy where Nick Adenhart and two others lost their life in an auto accident, while another is in critical condition holding on to his life.

On a day that should be one of the most memorable of my young professional career I find myself not worried about baseball and my own future in this game for the first time in a very, very long while. About an hour before we were supposed to head out to stretch for BP I received a voicemail on my phone. When I listened to it all I could hear was the pain and sorrow in my sister’s voice. I immediately called back thinking the worst only to be blindsided by something that I never saw coming. She had trouble telling me at first but there was nothing else to do except hit me with it. One of my best friends - a former teammate and roommate - had been in the car with Nick Adenhart that morning and she didn’t think that he had made it.

The accident that happened no more than a mile from where I spent my entire off season and most of the past 5 years of my life had claimed the life of three, two of which I had also known and spared one. I franticly called another close friend as my eyes now uncontrollably filled with tears and he filled me in.

He was alive and transported to UCI medical center, he is in critical but stable condition. He was internally decapitated I was told, he severed his tendons, ligaments and muscle tissue on the left side of his neck it was not cut, all the damage was done inside but his spinal cord was in tact and miraculously was responding to the doctors and even managed a thumbs up. The news came as a great relief but I still was at the field in Akron, OH thinking about a hospital in Irvine where my friend was lying in a bed fighting for his life.

I have never felt more helpless in my life. He is stable but has to undergo a spinal fusion that was supposed to be set sometime during our game last night I had so I had thought. I managed to make it out to batting practice on time trying to act like nothing was wrong except my mind was somewhere else. As soon as we were back in the clubhouse I grabbed my phone to find out the latest news. Nothing new to report, they aren’t letting anyone in but family and he is still set for surgery.

The game starts, Frank Herrman is dealing, and were sitting on a 0-0 ball game after 2 ½ innings. I take a moment to walk to the dugout and into the clubhouse to grab a quick drink and check my phone, something I shouldn’t be doing in a game but I couldn’t resist. One missed call, one new voicemail, it was another former teammate of mine but I wasn’t about to listen to the voicemail during a game where I still had a job to do.

It's the eighth inning and now were up 2-1, I'm getting my body loose waiting for a different call this time, this one is from my pitching coach telling me to get loose for the ninth. My body is in Ohio, my mind is in California, no matter how much I try to focus my mind it won’t allow it. I start getting angry. How does a twice convicted 22 year old with a previous DUI get behind the wheel of a car intoxicated without a license, run a red light, kill three people and put quite possibly one of the best people you will ever meet in your whole entire life in the hospital awaiting spinal surgery and yet get up and walk away from that? It never makes sense. I’m in the game now and I am erratic, I’m throwing now I’m not pitching, and I’m throwing with too much emotion.

The game is over we have won and I just recorded my first save in AA I should be the happiest guy in the clubhouse, but I’m not. I grab my phone tying to find out how the surgery went. Postponed, his neck was too swollen and they are pushing it back to Wednesday I’m told. Jon Wilhite the greatest man I have ever met, the nicest most selfless person I have met lays waiting.

Why do drivers that cause tragedies like these always seem to walk away? And why do great people always seem to get hurt? He has a fighting chance, he is tough, and I believe that without a doubt he will come out of this. Please pray for Jon, Courtney, Henry, and Nick. Keep fighting bud I will see you on Sunday.

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